Friday, October 3, 2014

Day 4

Day 1 in the hospital: super mom.  My poor child is sick.  I am well-rested. Let me fluff that pillow. Oh, is that light too bright? We make origami StarWars guys and read books.  A friend comes to visit and brings toy cars for L.  I welcome the chance to chat with her outside of school.  I am sure L will be better in a day or two.

Day 4: I have not slept in 3 days.  Whim is working tonight.  I'm wearing Tuesday's clothes, washed in the sink, dried on the balcony.  I'm using a rubberband as a pony tail holder. The boys  say things to me like: "My yogurt cup keeps tipping over every time I put the spoon in" and need answers from me.  Today I walked to 7-11 and bought a bag of chili paste flavored lays and stood outside the shop and ate the whole bag.  I don't even really like chips.  The boys watched garbage tv and played computer all afternoon.  I let them eat bread and honey instead of nice hospital dinners and M just spilled water on his hospital shirt and I can't stand the thought of having another conversation with the nurse or talking to any other person in the world even one more time, so he's sleeping shirtless until someone comes in here.  We are never going home.

I know how whiny I sound and how lucky I am that this is not our daily struggle.  I'm just so tired.

Update: New suit has been acquired.  I hope not to say another word to anyone until 6:00 am.

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