Dusit Zoo may be dingy and pathetic, but it's our dingy and pathetic outing of choice for a day off that falls at the end of the month. Even with train rides, souvenir splurges, and giraffe feeding, the whole day only puts us back a few dollars.
|The kids used these 50 baht binoculars nonstop.|
|These stairs provided at least 30 minutes of nonstop fun.|
M was so hard to control and L was still so little. Though at that time I had no idea how diet came in to play, I knew he had more seizures on days he didn't get enough rest. So day trips and outings (with the inevitable junk food and missed naps) were never easy days for us.
|At no point in yesterday's trip did the boys run in opposite directions |
and make me fear simultaneous double-abuductions
We always had some fun moments, of course. And we have many of those happy moments recorded in photos, thanks to Whim's skill as a photographer and his excellent timing. But behind the photos was always a story of stress, and meltdowns, and disappointment. I wish there wasn't so much pressure to appear to have it all together. I wonder if any of my friends are hiding similar struggles behind their own beautiful photos and cleverly-worded facebook updates?
If you are, just trust me that you aren't alone.
But back for a minute to that word normal. I've never come right out with a name for M's issues, but it's not because I'm trying to be mysterious or because we are above 'labels'. It's because I really don't know what to call it. I had wondered and worried about him for a while, but just at the time I started feeling legitimately concerned, we started the diet and things started changing.
I think it's safe to say that if M had been evaluated last year, he would have been diagnosed with ADHD. But if I am honest with myself, there was more than that going on. He had compulsive habits, exhibited Tourette's-like behavior at times, and even the autism spectrum didn't always seem completely out of the question to me. I have always loved and accepted M, but part of that acceptance was the awareness that he wasn't "normal".
Now, suddenly, unless he's reacting to a diet infraction, he is a typical four-year-old. Maybe it's just because we've been watching the Back to the Future trilogy all weekend with the boys, but I can't help thinking about how differently things could have turned out for him. Heavy.